Quick Life Update + Things to Read While I’m MIA

Hey hey! I know it’s been a little quiet over here on the blog lately, but I assure you that everything is okay. More than okay, actually, because I have some pretty exciting news…

Everybody, YA GIRL IS EMPLOYED!!!

That’s right, on January 2–just two days after I published my post about waiting periods of life and what I’ve learned during my five-month job search extravaganza–I was offered (and accepted) a full-time position with the Texas Health and Human Services Commission’s Community Partner Program in Houston. My first day will be tomorrow, January 18.

So as you can probably imagine, life has been an insane whirlwind of action items and a complete rollercoaster of emotions over the past 2 weeks. I have leased and furnished a one-bedroom apartment, set up insurance and utilities, acquired a business professional wardrobe, packed up all my things, driven across the country, and made approximately 482.5 trips to Target, Walmart, and IKEA. I’ve felt excited, scared, frustrated, energized, and exhausted. For every task I’ve checked off my to-do list, I’ve managed to add 3 more–contact this person, fax that form, buy this thing, sign that document.  And for every loved one I got to hug good-bye, there were many others whom I didn’t have the opportunity to see before I left Indiana. But despite the considerable amount of craziness and stress, I know I’m beginning a great adventure, and the best thing I can do is relax, enjoy the ride, and be extra kind to myself as I navigate the transition.

In that spirit, I’d like to let you all know what to expect here in the coming weeks/months.  I’d love to keep posting with some degree of regularity–after all, writing and connecting with readers is often what energizes me most when I’m overwhelmed. But since this blog is all about letting go of perfection and taking care of ourselves, I also want to give myself permission to not post if that is what works best during this time. If, instead of writing, I need to faceplant on my bed after an exhausting day of working or shopping or cleaning or unpacking or driving in circles because I don’t know where the heck anything is around here, then that’s what I’ll do.

So I thought I’d round up a few things for y’all to read in case I end up doing more faceplanting than blogging. If you missed any previous posts and are interested in learning more about my job search (and the many life lessons I learned along the way), here are all my posts on the topic:

  1. Job Searching & Self-Discovery, Part I: The Best Question for Clarifying Your Career Goals
  2. Job Searching & Self-Discovery, Part II: Identifying the Strengths & Skills You Have to Offer
  3. Eat, Pray, Resume: Figuring Out Your Life + Career Ambitions (A guest post I wrote for the lovely blog Nina Kardia!)
  4. Preparing for Takeoff: Finding Peace + Making Progress When You’re In a Waiting Period of Life

I’ve also read some other stuff on the interwebs lately that I think you might enjoy:

Well, that’s all for now; I gotta get back to the grind. I’d love to hear your advice regarding starting a new job and/or moving across the country, so please feel free to share in the comments below! I need all the help I can get. 🙂

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The Adventurous Life: How to Define Your Own Brand of Bravery

The Adventurous Life: How to Define Your Own Brand of Bravery | Don't think of yourself as adventurous? Think again! Learn how living adventurously can mean something different for each of us--and how to identify the risks truly worth taking in your own life.

When I hear the word “adventurous,” the first image that comes to mind is someone who spends his or her free time doing awesome things like skydiving and zip lining and scaling mountains. I picture someone who seizes every opportunity for new and fun experiences with little or no hesitation. I envision someone who thrives on taking risks both large and small and whose life motto is essentially “why not?”

When I hear the word “adventurous,” I also think of the exact opposite of me. As much as activities like skydiving and zip lining and scaling mountains sound awesome, they also sound kind of dangerous and expensive and let’s be real, I’d probably be equally content spending time alone writing and drinking coffee from my favorite mug (#turndownforwhat). I don’t think I’ve ever seized an opportunity without totally overthinking it first, and my idea of living on the edge is keeping my library books past the due date. And because I’m an INFJ obsessed with finding meaning and purpose in every freaking thing, my life motto is definitely “why?” as opposed to “why not?”

However, my conversations with my amazing therapist over the past 5 months have begun to shift my view of what it means to live adventurously–and for that matter, why it’s even important to do so in the first place. 

I’m about to make a big claim here, but it’s my blog, so…here goes nothing. I believe that the greatest adventure in life–and the bravest thing we’ll ever do–is to become the person each of us is meant to be. (And as a Christian, I believe this means becoming the person God created each of us to be.) Consequently, living adventurously means constantly challenging ourselves to step outside of our comfort zones in order to better align our actions with our values, goals, and unique strengths. Skydiving, zip lining, and scaling mountains may be out of my comfort zone, but is it imperative that I do these somewhat arbitrary things in order to live adventurously? Maybe, maybe not. It all depends on what I hold most dear.

For example, developing and sustaining deep and meaningful relationships is very important to me. I don’t need a large social network to be happy, but I do need a tight inner circle with whom I can be my most authentic self. However, as an introvert with a lot of social self-doubt, it feels much safer for me to hang out alone than to invite a family member or friend to catch up over coffee and risk feeling like a bother. And if we do end up meeting, it feels much safer for me to gloss over the tough stuff and act like everything’s fine than to admit to my struggles and risk being viewed as a Debbie Downer or an over-sharer. So for me, living adventurously means taking these risks on a regular basis anyway, because that’s really the only way to cultivate the types of relationships I’m after. And it also means returning the favor and being there for these individuals when they need me the most, when they’re scared to reach out or share, and loving them wholeheartedly, no strings attached.

As another example, having a fulfilling career is very important to me. This is not because I view my career as the pinnacle of my life and happiness but rather because I want to enjoy the many hours I put into my job and also feel like those hours are making a real difference in the world. But the further I get in my process of job searching and self-discovery, the more I realize that in order to achieve most of my professional goals, I’m going to have to step way outside my comfort zone. Leap outside it, really. My dream is to someday run my own online nutrition and wellness business, but that will be difficult and scary and require a significant shift away from the 9-to-5 mindset I’ve held for so long. (Even typing the words here is totally freaking me out.) It’s also likely that I will need to go back to school at some point and become a registered dietitian, which, after the completely overwhelming graduate school experience I completed just a few short months ago, is not exactly my favorite thing to think about right now. So living adventurously will mean going after these grand goals anyway, believing in myself even if no one else does, and knowing that I’ll still be enough even if I fail.

So maybe someday I will skydive, zip line, or scale a mountain. But if I do, it won’t be because I feel I need to in order to prove that I’m “adventurous” in some vague and arbitrary sense. Instead, it will be because it fits with my own brand of bravery and brings me closer to the person I was put on this planet to be. And that will be a risk truly worth taking.

What does living adventurously mean to you? How do your goals and values help you define your own brand of bravery?

Job Searching & Self-Discovery, Part II: Identifying the Strengths & Skills You Have to Offer

Job Searching & Self-Discovery, Part II: Identifying the Strengths & Skills You Have to Offer | Applying for jobs can be a frustrating and discouraging process, but it can also present a wonderful opportunity for reflection and self-discovery. Here's the strategy I used to clarify the skills and strengths I have to offer an employer.

In my last post, I discussed how lost I had been feeling in my post-grad job hunt until I took a step back from the applications and did a bit of soul searching. I found two strategies to be especially helpful during my little period of Eat, Pray, Résumé, the first of which was exploring my career goals in light of the kinds of problems and questions that get me really fired up–and not in terms of what I want to “be” someday.

Once I identified the issues I’m passionate about, I had to figure out what, exactly, I could offer in terms of addressing them. This is where strategy #2 came in. Are you ready?

Drumroll please…

I made a spreadsheet!

MS Excel lovers, can I get an amen?! Data haterz, stay with me; I promise that the core of this post isn’t really about spreadsheets at all.

Rather, the spreadsheet was a tool–a means of capturing an eagle’s eye view of my life and experiences so far. I went through dozens of old folders and files, reviewed past papers and projects and performance evaluations, and compiled a massive list of everything about me that could be relevant to a career, from my degrees and coursework to jobs and extracurricular activities to hobbies and personal endeavors. It was a big undertaking, to say the least, but so worth it. Because you know what happened?

I began to discern patterns.

I started to notice the types of projects at which I excel and the topics toward which I naturally gravitate–as well as the tasks that are more of a struggle and the subject areas that are more of a drag for me. I started to see which soft skills are truly my strengths and which ones…need some more work. And perhaps most importantly, I started to challenge notions I had previously held about myself.

For example, I’ve always considered myself to be a major rule-follower. And in many cases, I am–I dig structure and order and general societal harmony, yo. But reexamining my past in this systematic manner revealed something that really shocked me: when it comes to the work I do, I love pushing limits and finding new and imaginative (and sometimes totally goofy or weird) ways of doing things. Whether I’m in the kitchen doctoring up a new recipe or in the classroom using a goofy skit to convey information to my peers, I rarely just look at the instructions I’m given and say, yep, that’ll do. If you would have asked me, prior to compiling the Spreadsheet of Clarity, whether I viewed myself as innovative, I probably would have said no. But now? I would respond with an emphatic yes–and be able to provide concrete evidence to support my answer.

As another example, reviewing my past work reminded me of the totally obvious–I love to write. I can distinctly recall being seven or eight years old and holing up in a corner, drafting the Next Great American Novel with my super cool purple sparkly gel pen (#ninetiesbabe) while the rest of the kids did normal kid stuff. I remember filling notebook after notebook with poetry and journal entries in my preteen years and throwing myself into my creative writing class in high school. The projects I was most proud of in college were typically reports and papers, and now, here I am, blogging for funzies. Before, if you would have asked me if I viewed myself as a writer, I would have said no–I didn’t major in English or journalism, and I’ve never been paid for my work. But now? Yeah, I think I may be a writer.

Tying all of this back in with Operation Job Search, the spreadsheet-making process helped to clarify what I have to offer an employer as well as what I’m looking for in a job.  I then revisited what I had discovered when I asked myself which problems most intrigue me, and I saw an important connection. I’m fascinated  with the fact that we live in society that is both saturated with health information and plagued with numerous health problems, and I want a career with plenty of opportunity for creativity, innovation, and writing. I don’t have everything figured out, of course, but it’s becoming more and more clear that a job in health communications would be a great fit for me. So this is where I’ve focused my job search since then, and it feels so much more “right” than when I was applying to a random assortment of positions across the public health field.

So if you’re ever lost in the career exploration process like I was, or if you even just need a reminder of who you really are–I highly encourage you to do what I did. Even if you don’t make a list or spreadsheet, and even if you don’t have a lot of extra time on your hands, take just an hour or so to reexamine what you’ve done. Look for patterns. Challenge previously held notions about what you can and can’t do. What do you find?

Job Searching & Self-Discovery, Part I: The Best Question for Clarifying Your Career Goals

Job Searching & Self-Discovery, Part I: The Best Question for Clarifying Your Career Goals | Applying for jobs can be a frustrating and discouraging process, but it can also present a wonderful opportunity for reflection and self-discovery. Here's the best question I asked myself in order to clarify my life and career goals.

I’m currently looking for my first full-time job out of graduate school, and I’m beginning to understand what people mean when they talk about the difference between the “academic bubble” and the “real world.”

In school, you’re given a syllabus that clearly outlines what is expected of you. In most cases, if you adhere to the guidelines, submit your work on time, and generally try your best, your efforts will be rewarded. And if your work isn’t quite up to par, you can easily request feedback on what you need to do to improve. In the job search arena, on the other hand, you can follow every tip and trick out there for formatting your resume, you can pour your heart and soul into your cover letter, and you can spiff up your LinkedIn profile until you’ve reached “all-star” status–and you can still be met with total radio silence.

Bubble = popped.

Yet despite its many discouraging aspects, the job application process can also present a wonderful opportunity for self-discovery. I know that personally, it has prompted me to explore some of my greatest fears about the future and clarify many of my life and career aspirations.

About two months ago, a series of conversations with my therapist revealed how terrified I was of getting stuck in a job that I’m not passionate about, that offers little room for growth and creativity, that constantly drains my time and energy and compels me to live for nights, weekends, and those few precious vacation days each year. The reasons underlying these fears were numerous and complex, but a huge factor was that I simply didn’t know what I wanted to do, and it’s pretty hard to find something if you don’t know what you’re looking for. I love my field (public health), but it’s so broad and interdisciplinary that the career possibilities are almost endless. That’s awesome, of course, but also seriously overwhelming.

Once I realized this need for greater clarity, I took a break from the job apps and focused instead on research and exploration. After many hours of reading, listening to podcasts, journaling, conversing with trusted mentors, and taking a hard look at what I really have to offer the world based on my knowledge, skills, and experiences, I have arrived at a much clearer picture of what I want my career–and life–to look like. Within my broad field, I have discovered several niches that I believe make a truly good fit, and armed with this knowledge, I have begun applying for jobs once more.

Because the purpose of this blog is to detail a journey toward living a more vibrant and authentic life, and because I know that a lot of other students and recent grads are facing similar struggles, I’d like to share two key strategies that have helped me achieve greater clarity in my career goals.

Today I’ll discuss the first one: Asking the right questions.

It seems that one of the most common questions adults ask of young people is some variation of What do you want to be when you grow up? And I totally get it–it’s a reliable conversation starter that demonstrates interest in the individual’s personality and aspirations. I’ve posed this inquiry plenty of times myself, and always with good intentions. However, in attempting to discern my next steps, I have found this question to be unhelpful at best and downright counterproductive at worst.

We live in a world where lifelong careers with the same company or under the same job title are becoming increasingly rare, where many people study one subject in college and then end up working in an entirely different field, where technological advancements seem to create new positions–and render others totally obsolete–on a daily basis. Thus, asking young people what they’d like to “be” when they grow up encourages them to conceptualize their career path in a way that often doesn’t coincide with reality. There are exceptions, of course, but even relatively straightforward jobs can involve twists and turns–a teacher may decide to move into an administrative role, or a doctor may choose to start seeing fewer patients in favor of pursuing research. And personally, I recall hating this question as a teenager because it made me feel like, at the ripe old age of 15, I had to have the rest of my life figured out. Rather than knowing where I might want to start after college, I had to know what I wanted to “be” for the next 40+ years.

Instead, I have found it far more useful to reflect on what kinds of societal problems and questions most intrigue me. For example, I am fascinated by the fact that despite the plethora of health information available today, many people still do not adhere to basic recommendations for diet, physical activity, sleep, stress, alcohol and tobacco consumption, sun protection, food safety, and more. Identifying and addressing the reasons underlying this reality–including poor health literacy, a lack of access to necessary resources, competing priorities, or inaccurate perceptions of outcome severity and susceptibility–is literally the kind of thing that makes me want to get out of bed in the morning (public health nerd alert). It’s the place where my passions and the world’s needs collide, which has to mean something in terms of finding a career that’s flexible, fulfilling, and in demand.

In my next post, I’ll discuss the second key strategy I’ve used to clarify my career goals. Until then, I’d love to hear about your job search experiences (success stories and horror stories both welcome!) and thoughts on asking What do you want to be when you grow up?