A Playlist for New Beginnings: Songs for Moving On & Starting Over

A Playlist for New Beginnings: Songs for Moving On & Starting Over | Here are some of my favorite songs for saying goodbye to the past, embracing the future, and remembering that it’s okay to not have it all figured out yet.

This past weekend, I attended a concert featuring Mat Kearney, one of my all-time favorite singer/songwriters. As he strummed the first chords of his early single, “Nothing Left to Lose,” I was immediately taken back to the very first time I ever heard the song: 9th grade, on the school bus, in the dark of the early morning. The melody caught my attention as it played over the radio, and in typical 2006 fashion, I lamented over the fact that I didn’t know the name of the song or artist–and therefore wouldn’t be able to purchase the track on iTunes and download it to my brand new, hot pink iPod nano. (Will this be the “walk uphill both ways to school” story that I tell my future children?)

In that moment of reminiscence, I was truly awed by the power of music to so instantly and effortlessly transport us to a different time and place. Often, these times and places are from our past; for example, whenever I hear the Beach Boys’ hit “Barbara Ann,” I’m suddenly a little girl again in my old house on Heritage Street, and I’m dancing around the living room with my dad and younger sister as the tune plays on our stereo. And whenever I hear “Teenage Dream” by Katy Perry, I find myself a college freshman once more, cruising in the car with my girlfriends on a sunny August day as we pass by a fraternity house and hear the song blasting from their speakers.

But I think that music also has a way of carrying us into the future–whether by lifting us out of a dark place and encouraging us to press onward, by enabling us to grasp the bigger picture and deeper meaning of our current situation, or by simply reassuring us that we’re not the first person to ever feel this way. So last spring, when I could finally begin to discern the light at the end of the grad school tunnel, I started searching for songs that took me to the place where I wanted to be. Over time, what began as just two or three tracks gradually blossomed into a full-fledged playlist that I’m excited to share with all of you today. The songs that comprise my “New Beginnings” soundtrack speak to a variety of emotions and experiences associated with moving on, from waving a hearty goodbye to the past and embracing the future in all of its uncertainty, to hesitating in taking the first steps forward, to remembering that it’s okay to not have it all together yet.

So without further ado, happy listening! I hope that wherever you are in your life right now, these songs will bless you with a dose of positivity and encouragement. And if nothing else, some of these tunes are pretty darn catchy! (I dare you to sit still through “Goodbye,” “Movin’ on Up,” or “Welcome to Your Life.” Go on, try it.) Then, when your jam session is complete, comment below with your thoughts on the playlist and/or tell me about your favorite songs for moving onward and upward!

Spotify users: If you’re currently logged into your account, you can click on any track below and start listening right away. If you’re not logged in, clicking on the playlist below will prompt you to do so. 

Non-Spotify users: Clicking on the playlist below will prompt you to sign up for Spotify. If you’ve never tried it, it’s a pretty amazing digital music service that I use practically everyday, so I highly recommend it! (I’m not receiving any sort of compensation for this endorsement; I’m just a huge fan!) But if you prefer to get your tunes another way, I’ve also created a graphic displaying all of the track and artist names. Enjoy! 

A Playlist for New Beginnings | Songs for saying goodbye to the past, embracing the future, and remembering that it’s okay to not have it all figured out yet.

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Managing Anxiety: 5 (More) Strategies That Have Worked for Me

Managing Anxiety: 5 (More) Strategies That Have Worked for Me | Strategies such as getting more sleep and drinking less coffee can help keep anxiety at bay.

In my last post, I discussed five strategies, such as taking medication and seeing a therapist, that have helped me manage anxiety in the months since I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD). Today I have five additional tactics to share, this time focused on daily lifestyle modifications.

  1. Overhauling my sleep schedule. Thanks to a combination of evening classes, a heavy workload, and my natural night owl tendencies, I essentially morphed into a semi-nocturnal zombie during grad school. Based on my sleep habits in high school and college, though, I know that I typically feel my best when I go to bed and wake up on the earlier side. So this summer, I have made a concerted effort not only to get more sleep, but also to sleep during the hours when I seem to benefit from it the most. Though challenging, these changes have truly paid off. I find that when I’m well-rested, I’m better able to keep minor problems and inconveniences in perspective rather allowing them to overwhelm me and completely derail my day. When my mind is clear and focused, I can accomplish more in less time and approach challenges with greater patience and creativity. And by golly, when I don’t spend my entire day eagerly awaiting the moment I get to crawl back in bed, life is just a lot more fun.
  2. Restructuring my morning routine. Now that I’m waking up considerably earlier than before, my morning routine has gone from frantic to focused and from exhausting to energizing. Not surprisingly, having sufficient time to shower/get ready at a comfortable pace and eat an actual breakfast–sometimes even while sitting at an actual table–has helped to minimize a great deal of chaos. But even more importantly, building in a bit of “me” time to work on a writing project or other creative endeavor before the craziness of the day sets in has paid off immensely. Until recently, I thought that this idea sounded not only unrealistic but also totally indulgent–have fun before the sun rises? Start my day off with my want-to-do list rather than my have-to-do list? Ain’t nobody got time for that! But after listening to a series of podcasts about optimizing morning routines (by Jeff Sanders of The 5 AM Miracle), I realized that I could make time for these activities and that doing so could positively impact numerous areas of my life. When I indulge my creative side in the early hours, I actually look forward to getting out of bed, feel more energized throughout the day, and dread the challenging or unpleasant items on my to-do list a little bit less. And my anxiety, which is typically fueled by feeling overwhelmed and out of control, is greatly lessened by this daily dose of intention and self-care.
  3. Drinking less coffee. Y’all, y’all, y’all. Coffee is my spirit animal. I love the taste, the smell, the feeling of holding a warm mug in my hands, and the excitement of trying new varieties and exploring different cafes. So when I realized that my beloved beverage was causing me some problems (such as nasty withdrawal headaches if I didn’t have my usual fix), my feelings of betrayal were worthy of an Adele power ballad. Since the thought of trying to break a caffeine addiction amidst the craziness of school and work was far too daunting, I decided to wait until after graduation to do anything about it. And since I couldn’t bear the thought of giving up coffee entirely, I chose instead to cut back to one cup in the mornings. I eliminated my afternoon java by gradually transitioning from half caf to decaf to no coffee at all, and after surviving an initial rough patch (thank goodness for extra strength Tylenol!), I found that my energy levels and mood noticeably stabilized and my usual “after dinner” headache seemed to disappear. Perhaps one day I’ll decide to eliminate my morning cup as well, but for now, I plan to savor it with all my might.
  4. Practicing yoga on a regular basis. I started doing yoga in the 7th grade and continued practicing until I injured my shoulder during my junior year of college. The long, frustrating process of recovering from this incident has included surgery, several rounds of physical therapy, a boatload of rest, and even a semester of wheeling a bright green rolling book bag around campus and totally bringing sexy back. Then, several months ago, I was finally feeling strong enough to roll out my mat again and try a few poses. I experienced some stiffness in my shoulder but no pain, so I gradually began practicing more frequently and for longer periods of time. And oh, how good it feels to be back! The deep stretches help to relieve the tension that tends to accumulate in my neck and back when I’m anxious, and the emphasis on mindfulness helps me to focus on the present rather than letting my thoughts run away with worries and worst-case scenarios.
  5. Getting lost in a funny, heartwarming story. I’m not much of a TV watcher, but for some reason I took it upon myself to watch all seven seasons of Gilmore Girls on Netflix this summer. As I sit here in the post-finale slump, counting down the days until the revival series premieres in November, I can look back at all the ways in which the show has proven to be an unexpected blessing in my recovery process. Sometimes it simply provided a much-needed laugh or distraction from my problems, whereas other times it hit close to home and challenged me to see situations in my own life in a new light. But most of all, watching a cast of generally lovable and well-meaning characters navigate the challenges of life reminded me that it’s okay to be human. It’s okay to mess up, to have an “off” day (or to just take a day off), and to have doubts and questions even when you’re exactly where you’re supposed to be. (How’s that for a binge-watching justification?) 

And that’s a wrap! As always, I’d love to hear from you, so please leave any questions or comments below!

 

 

Managing Anxiety: 5 Strategies That Have Worked for Me

Managing Anxiety: 5 Strategies That Have Worked For Me | Strategies such as embracing the diagnosis and seeing a trusted therapist can help keep anxiety at bay.

This past January, I visited my doctor to discuss some disturbing symptoms I was experiencing, namely dizziness, chest pains, and a rapid heart rate at the most unexpected and inexplicable times (such as when I was driving, lying in bed, or sitting in church). I walked into her office terrified that at just 24 years old, I was already exhibiting signs of early-onset cardiovascular disease. I walked out with the knowledge that while my heart and blood vessels were functioning just fine, my brain was another story: I was experiencing Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) along with panic symptoms. (Later on I would learn that I demonstrated many symptoms of clinical depression as well.)

In the months since these discoveries, I have taken a number of steps in hopes of improving my mental (and subsequently physical) health. I still have a long way to go, and GAD may be something that I have to learn to cope with for the rest of my life. Nonetheless, I have found a number of strategies and lifestyle modifications to be helpful thus far, and today I’d like to share some of them with you.

Unfortunately, given the relatively high prevalence of anxiety disorders (including panic disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, post-traumatic stress disorder, phobias, and separation anxiety disorder), it seems quite likely that either you, dear reader, or someone you know and love suffers from one of these conditions. So while the following strategies may not be groundbreaking, I feel compelled to share, if for no other reason than to offer hope for the many others in similar situations. And although I am not a medical professional and am therefore in no position to diagnose or treat anyone else, I do have six years of public health education under my belt, so I intend to discuss the issues in an informed and responsible manner.

I have a total of 10 tips to share, but since I’m nothing if not verbose, I’ll keep this post at a manageable length by discussing only the first half. So without further ado, here are five strategies that have helped me manage my anxiety over the past seven months. And although I’m not focusing specifically on depression in this post, many of these same tactics have helped me tackle those symptoms as well.

  1. Embracing the diagnosis and admitting that I need help. Although the diagnostic labeling of mental health issues can be a controversial topic, for me, discovering that my experiences had a name was immensely helpful. It enabled me to research the disorder and better understand what was going on in my body and mind; it gave me an explanation for my irrational thoughts and actions other than “I’m ridiculous” or “I suck.” It provided me with the vocabulary I needed to communicate my situation to others and helped me to understand that I wasn’t alone in my struggles. And most of all, having a diagnosis forced me to finally acknowledge the gravity of my situation and motivated me to take action and reach out for help. I was no longer just “stressed about school”; I was truly miserable and functioning suboptimally in almost every area of my life, and I lacked the knowledge and resources to turn things around all by myself.
  2. Taking medication. I was initially a bit reluctant and ashamed to take the selective serotonin reuptake inhibitor (SSRI) that my doctor prescribed. The list of potential side effects made my current symptoms seem like a cakewalk, and since I’ve always been an advocate of making holistic lifestyles changes rather than relying solely on pills, I felt like a hypocrite for taking meds right away without at least attempting therapy first. (Therapy came later; see item #3.) But my desperation drove me to start taking the medication anyway and I’m so glad that I did. My panic symptoms (dizziness, chest pains, and racing heartbeat) have completely disappeared, and I haven’t experienced any noticeable side effects. We eventually upped my daily dose a bit and I’m happy with where we’re at right now. Yay for normal serotonin levels!

  3. Seeing a therapist with whom I really connect. Once I finished the semester and my schedule was more accommodating, I started making the 1-hour commute to visit a therapist who came highly recommended by several people I know. Although I wasn’t expecting to find a perfect fit on the first try, after just one session with Nicole, I completely understood why these individuals had spoken so highly of her. She was warm, funny, and an incredible listener, able to weave the various threads of my experiences together into a coherent picture for me to gaze and reflect upon. I laughed, I cried, and I discussed things I hadn’t even realized were bothering me, and the whole time I felt completely comfortable and respected, even when she pointed out that some of my thoughts or actions might be irrational or counterproductive. I’ve continued seeing her all summer and can’t believe the difference. Whereas my medication has helped alleviate my physical panic symptoms, therapy has helped tackle the thought patterns that send me into a spiral of anxiety in the first place.

  4. Talking and writing openly about my experiences. Initially, I wanted to share what I was going through with as few people as possible–my parents, my boyfriend, and maybe one or two friends. I was still processing it all myself and didn’t know how to go about discussing it with others. So for a while, I waited, avoiding the topic whenever possible and speaking vaguely of “appointments” and “medication” whenever I couldn’t get around it. And that’s totally okay! Eventually, though, I felt that I was ready to share–that in a way, I needed to share. My public health education had taught me many things, one of which was that mental health issues are incredibly common and yet all too often not diagnosed, treated, or even discussed. I had always lamented this reality and wanted to do something about it; here was a glaring opportunity. So I started by writing, and then, with some trepidation, by sharing that writing. Hitting “publish” on my first blog post was both terrifying and thrilling; I was finally being completely open and honest about my mental health, but what would people think? Would friends and family suddenly find me burdensome and unstable? Would colleagues be less likely to trust me with major tasks at work for fear that I might not be able to handle the pressure? Would everyone roll his or her eyes and tell me to get over myself? I was fortunate to receive an overwhelmingly positive response, but I see now that even if I hadn’t had such a warm reception, sharing my experiences was the right move for me. On a personal level, writing and talking about anxiety, depression, fear, perfection, vulnerability, mindfulness, identity, and more have been incredibly therapeutic, and on a professional level, I like knowing that in some small way, I’m helping to fight a stigma that causes so many people to suffer in silence.

  5. Being patient with myself. In some regards, I’m a very patient person; however, when it comes to my own personal development, I often expect myself to have it together at all times, to be good at things on the first try, and to flawlessly and immediately adapt to whatever life throws my way. When I started realizing that I would never expect this level of perfection from a family member or friend, I knew that it was time to start being kinder and more patient with myself. I’m going through a lot of life transitions right now, with graduation, moving, and the search for my first full-time job. It’s okay that it’s taking me more than a day, a week, or even a month to wrap my brain around it all. I also can’t expect managing my anxiety to be a perfectly linear process; there will still be plenty of days when I find myself overthinking the smallest of things, worrying about the unlikeliest of scenarios, or feeling tense and panicked for no discernible reason. I’m aiming for large-scale progress, not day-to-day perfection.

So there you have it! In the next installment, I plan to focus more on health behaviors such as sleep, exercise, and caffeine intake. In the meantime, if you have any advice of your own for managing anxiety (whether or not you have a diagnosed disorder), please feel free to leave a comment and enlighten us!